Blog #8: To Be Self-Aware...

Watching Miss Representatation was a powerful view into the lives of women and the struggles they face. I had a surface level understanding of equal rights, the mis-representation of women, and the societal pressures they undergo. I have a deeper understanding and appreciation for the struggle now.

My husband works in education counseling, and I often hear stories of girls cutting themselves, hanging themselves in their home, letting men abuse their bodies over and over from Junior High on. It's even happening in elementary school now. I've heard stories about the girls who wear the rubber bands on their wrists in different colors, signifying what they have done sexually, how many times they've done it, and what they are willing to do. And while suicide would be considered the worst for a family to experience, the most gut wrenching issue I heard about was a girl in Junior High who kept a journal of all the guys she had sex with — pages of them — and she had a rating system, stats, and what they did written down. She lost it at school and a teacher found it and turned it in to the counseling office. When they called in the girl and her mother, the response was the same from each..."So What".  If I were to ask myself what would drive a girl to dis-respect her body, and most likely have such self-loathing, the question would certainly be easy to answer in this case. But most of the time it is not easy to see the source, that is until your faced with truths in a documentary such as this.

Fag, homo, queer, weak, sissy, damned... this is the definition of manhood I grew up with.  Bitch, slut, fat, skank, easy, worthless... is no better a definition for a female to grow up with either. Even with the momentous court ruling for marriage rights yesterday, I can look back at our history and know that discrimination and hatred will never cease. I only need to examine the progress we've made since the 13th Amendment, 19th Amendment, Civil Rights, and Equal Opportunity. The hate and animosity is still present and strong in our society.

I've worked in advertising for a long time, so I have plenty of first hand knowledge in regards to the meetings that happen on how to best design a campaign to twist the public mind. I've witnessed the intense air-brushing and photo manipulation that happens in producing many of these campaigns. From that experience, I live with many of the suggestions made at the end of the documentary.  I don't buy magazines. I mute the TV and walk away during commercials. In fact, I hardly watch TV and when I do, I typically watch a movie or show on Netflix or Hulu that I know has little to no advertising at all. I use Facebook & Twitter strictly for providing links to my blog. I created a dummy twitter account strictly for school purposes. I don't spend time scanning the feeds or reading the massive amount of garbage online. I only use Instagram as a means of letting those friends and family who care know what I am doing, yet only posting at most 2-3 times a month.

That said, I can't imagine the rest that women have to deal with. The societal pressure to buy $15,000 to $18,000 in makeup per year!!!  WHAT??? I have even joked a few times with some of my female friends, saying I don't know how you can afford to buy all the beauty products that you do AND still afford rent, food, bills, and any entertainment. In my eyes, a female is more beautiful without all the covering, but I know my opinion is in the severe minority.

So what do I mean by Self-Aware? The definition tells us it is "the idea that when people focus their attention on themselves, they evaluate and compare their behavior to their own internal standards and values." Looking back to those standards I listed earlier as we have been defined by our peers — by other human beings — what kind of internal standards will these girls grow up with? I've mentioned the human race issue in a few of my earlier posts. If we have evolved into beings with such intelligence, why is the human condition so destructive and so hateful to one another? Maybe if every penis was the same size and every set of breasts were exactly the same, would that make the difference?  Would it be better if everyone were blond with blue eyes? We've seen humankind make that attempt before and witnessed the devastating affect it had and the millions of valuable human life lost. Maybe soon it will be brown hair and green eyes and the rest of us will be gassed, poisoned, or just shot in the head. Crude thoughts and statements, but being uncomfortable helps to spark new cognitions.

Who makes the call that these are the appropriate standards we must live by? Based on the documentary, the media and the money belong to the most powerful outlets. It was mentioned in the documentary and I mentioned it in my Blog #3 post regarding the control of news and media by 7 giants. But then, the 99% of us have allowed the top tier elites to control us and we pour our money into their pockets practically every day. Trust me when I state...they DO NOT want us to think for ourselves.

I have no right to judge your beauty, nor does anyone else have the right to judge mine. And despite overwhelming negative observations right here in my own community, I do have an optimistic view of our future. I do believe we have it within us to be good, kind and loving to one another. We have amazing intellect, I hope we all can learn to have Independent thought versus Interdependent thought. You, me, each of us, is NOT the idea and creation of someone else's vision. Do not let social conformity guide our footsteps, otherwise we are simply puppets on a string. Then the question we will have to face is "What's the point?"